Rarely has Silicon Valley experienced a more profound period of transformation than it has in the past handful of years. The big VC boom of 2020–2021. The great VC hangover starting in 2022. The global pandemic and its massive impact on tech adoption. The collapse of Silicon Valley Bank. And more recently the advent of AI, which, even in the middle of massive VC pullback in every other category, is driving ever-growing VC rounds at stratospheric valuations.
And that’s just looking at the money. The social and political side of Silicon Valley also took dramatic turns, with a period of employee activism and embrace of pro-diversity goals, to the right-ward shift of many big VCs and nationwide DEI backlash.
Yet in the midst of wave after wave of unprecedentedness, one thing remains troublingly constant: According to Pitchbook data, the share of dollars VCs give to women has hovered around the 2% mark for this entire otherwise volatile period.
To better understand the stories behind the numbers, my VC firm, Graham & Walker, surveyed 180 North-America-based female founders this spring, all of whom have raised or plan to raise venture capital. The results, detailed in the report “Forged in Fire,” highlight the fraught journey many founders face today, and the specific challenges faced by women.
1. There’s a caregiving tax for female founders
Fifty-five percent of our founders are caregivers—juggling kids, aging parents, or disabled family members while building companies. Conventional wisdom says this is a disadvantage. And in a lot of ways, it was: caregiver founders were slightly less likely to work more than 60 hours per week, had slightly higher rates of burnout, and were more likely to report sacrificing health and sleep.
“Before kids I could force success with a massive amount of working hard,” one founder told us. “Now it’s harder to work the amount of hours I used to.” Another noted she pays “an insane amount of money to nannies to make my job work.”
But here’s the twist: Time constraints breed more thoughtful operators. “Being a parent has made me more efficient, focused, and resilient,” said one founder. “I’ve become incredibly strategic in decision-making and delegation.”
2. Gender is seen as a major barrier to fundraising
“It has been sheer hell—there is no other way to describe it,” one founder wrote about her fundraising experience, capturing the sentiment of most respondents. Forty percent cited their gender as the biggest barrier to raising capital. Many reported being explicitly told to “hire a male co-founder” to increase their chances of success, and a few deliberately did so. “I purposely chose a white male cofounder with a business background to make VC easier this time. Why bang your head against a wall when you don’t have to?”
3. Women pitch to skepticism while men pitch to opportunity
Female founders consistently report being asked “What could go wrong?” while knowing their male counterparts get asked “How big could this get?” This echoes Harvard research on gendered questioning patterns and has real funding consequences.
“They ask how we’re not going to fail, versus asking males how they will succeed. It’s so biased,” one respondent noted. Another pleaded: “Don’t just ask us what could go wrong. Ask us what could go right.” They’re forced to pitch defensively instead of painting the vision.
4. Female founders are ahead of the curve on AI
Despite reports that women adopt AI slower, 86% of female founders are already using AI as an agent, enhancer, and thought partner. All-female teams are actually more optimistic about AI than mixed-gender teams (56% versus 46%).
Why the optimism? “AI allows us to do more with less, which is what we’ve always had to do anyway,” one founder explained.
5. Female founders have quiet strengths
Forty-six respondents detailed ways in which being a woman is an asset for execution, in many cases as a direct result of the challenges they face. They mention their penchant for prioritizing, hard-learned execution prowess, and extraordinary resiliency. The very experiences that make entrepreneurship harder also make these entrepreneurs stronger.
And in direct defiance of conventional advice, female founders don’t believe they should be pitching with more hype and bravado like male founders often do. “We’re more realistic about outcomes and humble about successes,” said one founder. But this doesn’t mean female founders lack ambition. “Speaking brashly, loudly, or aggressively is not a requirement for building a great company,” said one respondent.
Silicon Valley’s real heroes are hiding in plain sight
Most salient among the findings is a stark contrast between the huge barriers these founders face and the clear-eyed optimism with which they face them.
Seventy-one percent of female founders said their last round was harder than expected, regardless of whether they had strong traction and prior experience. Forty-seven percent said economic conditions are hurting their business, and 46% also cited political uncertainty under the current U.S. administration as a direct threat. Three quarters have experienced burnout, and more than a third believe their gender has negatively impacted their business success.
Despite it all, 72% of female founders are optimistic about reaching their next milestone. In the words of one respondent, “I never become less optimistic, I just become smarter at managing the conditions. Part of being a founder is relentless optimism.”
In this contrast lies a source for inspiration. These women are everyday superheroes: defying the odds, turning constraints into competitive advantages, building businesses by sheer force of will, refusing to take no for an answer. Solving massive problems with limited resources. And proving that grit goes further than privilege.
All they ask for is a chance. As one respondent put it, “There’s a huge amount of money to be made out of taking women seriously.”
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